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Flooble Horroscopes

Aries (Ram)
Born March 21 - April 19
Aggressive to the extreme, the Aries is primitive - warlike and cruel. Not the sharpest tool in the shed, he often has trouble remembering the simplest of things. The Aries will often try to backstab his peers, but luckily, he usually lacks the mental capacity to succeed. He is vulgar and blunt, and incapable of subtelty.

From early childhood, Rams aspire to be a career soldier or an austronaut - which is why they constantly go around trying to pick fights with everyone they meet.

An Aries should be kept as far away from family savings as possible - he will blow it all at the first chance, but will not remember how or why. He is unbearably dull in a conversation, mostly due to an annoying tendency to ramble on for hours about himself, completely oblivious to those around him. When drunk, an Aires will usually become roudy and violent, oftem making a scene.

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